Monday, March 10, 2008

Your Inner self


A lot has happened in the last two months - that remind me of the inner self staying strong. A dear, dear friend named Linda went into the hospital in Denver on the 14th of January 2008 for what she thought/hoped/prayed would be only a 5-7 day stay, with a longer recovery. Over the course of six plus weeks, she fought like a trouper to overcome the six hour surgery, and we thought she was going to come through it, till the 27th of February, and she passed away on the 28th. One of the most telling comments was "She is a FIGHTER, she is going to overcome this!" SO many things happened, almost every weekend we would get a call to pray for her, and quickly, she was incredibly ill, and with God's Strength, that inner woman came through, and would appear to be getting better, and the next setback would hit. So many over the course of the recovery and she just wore out, bless her heart. We will all miss her incredibly. When we think of her, we think laughter. No matter what beset her, kids in the military, deploying, moving, etc, she was able to look on the bright side, pull up her strong inner woman, and laugh at some point. Her inner person is laughing and singing in Heaven today. She was a testimony to all to the end.

I was not here for her Memorial, I flew to Fayetteville, NC to help my son Grant drive back, with his car on a trailer behind a 16 foot Budget van. There was a possibility of being back Friday night, but with delays, and weather, icy roads that caused an overnight halt in Frankfort, KY... we got back on Sunday, and the Memorial was on Saturday, and lasted for two hours, then they had a wonderful time of fellowship after.

My son and I listened to the first 6 Chapters of Joel's next book on CD as we traversed MO and KS Sunday. Joel does go back over a lot of things covered in this book in the new one, but my son at one point said, "Mom, I LIKE this guy."

I will now think of my 'inner woman' standing up when I feel down from now on. There are so many things that try to keep us down. Losing my friend is just the pitts... on the trip I was thinking of things to tell her, then would realize I couldn't.... she used to get such a kick out of my trip excursions, and would share her own stories of her camping trips that she adored. I would shake off the feelings of loss and tell myself to buck up and get on with it... that she is well off now.

My son leaves for his next post in two weeks, Fairbanks, AK. He was pretty shocked when he was told where he was going, but within a short time, he began to look forward to the duty station, however-he may be deploying soon. His inner man is thinking forward to what it holds for him, the new adventures. I have had to tell myself to just "let go and Let GOD" so many times, because I know with God's protection he will be just fine, in fact, I HOPE to go visit him!

There were so many, many statements on the CD that we both identified with, and at one point Grant stated that he knew of someone he would like to have listen to the CD.

I am really, really enjoying this blog, I can relate to the book so much, and one out-of-the-ordinary thing happened at the airport when I was leaving for Fayetteville via Atlanta. I was reading ahead in our book, taking notes, so I could blog when I got to Grant's home, and had closed the book for a moment. A man leaned over, and in a strange tone asked "ARE you enjoying THAT book?" "Well, yessir, I am." "Re-all-y?" he said. "Yes, really. My husband is not a big fan of Joel, but he hasn't read the book, but I AM. I feel you can get anything out of any book, you take what you can use." I replied. He waited a minute, then his nose sort of out of joint, he said "Do you believe in Jesus Christ?" I said yes. He asked a few more pointed questions, then he said, "ARE you a born again BELIEVER?" I looked him right in the eye, and I said "IS THERE ANY OTHER WAY?" He sat back for a moment, then said "There are a lot of other ways you could have answered that, that was good." That was the end of our conversation, he got on his plane, I waited. I continue to wonder what he was really asking me. You can tell it has left me with more questions than answers that I will probably never get.

Thank you, Patty, for inviting me to this blog. It has opened my eyes to possibilities, reinforced beliefs, and lead to some interesting discussions!

4 comments:

Patty said...

Hi Rozan! Thanks for blogging. I'm in Phoenix, AZ, right now, but when I get home to our regular PC I have a picture of you, me, and our hubbies on it. I would love to illustrate your post with it.

I am so sorry that you lost your friend Linda. I know you blogged about her a couple of times. This has to be a tough time for you. I'm glad you have such positive memories of her.

I am so glad that you are blogging and enjoying the book. It is a very controversial book in the Christian world b/c traditionally I think many people are more comfortable with a pessimistic message than an optimistic message. Most of us say we are optimists but inside we are afraid to hope for too much. If we have low expectations, we feel like we can ward off disappointment. I lived that way for many years myself. I wonder if the man at the airport felt that it would be holier to live a life in sackcloth and ashes than with the crown of victory on his head. All we can do is claim God's Word. Ephesians 6:13 says, "When you've done everything you know how to do,just keep on standing firm." Joel quotes another scripture in Hebrews 10:35--"Don't cast away your confidence, for payday is coming." I also like the Eleanor Roosevelt quote, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." Personally, I want the attitude of a victor. I think so many people are drawn to this book b/c it is about hope. In Psalms 51:10, David says, "God, renew a right spirit within me." God bless you, Rozan, and thank you for keeping a positive spirit through everything. You are an inspiration.

Patty said...

I love the story about the little boy in chapter 21 "Getting Up on the Inside". The little guy was in church with his mother, and he had too much energy to sit still so he kept standing on the pew. His mom would keep reminding him to sit down, and he would comply for a few seconds and then stand up again. After several times of this, the mother placed her hand on the boy's head and pushed him down into the seat. The boy sat there smiling and then told his mother, "Mom, I may be sitting down on the outside, but I'm standing up on the inside." I told our pastor this story after our church had been robbed. She was feeling so bad, and I had just read this chapter and I related this story to her, hoping that it would help. She used it in her sermon!! She told her congregation that no matter how bad we feel about the robbery, we need to stand up on the inside. It takes courage and determination to stand firm in the face of adversity, but we must not let anyone, any circumstance, or any event take away our joy.

Patty said...

I didn't have to wait until I got home to illustrate your post. I found the picture on my laptop!! It was in some obscure folder that I hadn't seen previously.

Now, back to discussing this chapter, I like the way Joel starts out with, "Many people give up far too easily when things don't go their way or they face some kind of adversity.....Before long they're down and discouraged. That's understandable...especially when we've struggled with a problem or a weakness for a long time." He then encourages us to find strength and perseverance through it all. I'm reminded of the verse in James 1:2-4, "Consider it pure joy, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." Perseverance will empower us to overcome. Joel says that the biblical David "encouraged and strengthened himself in the Lord his God" (Isaiah 30:6). Another quote from Joel I like is, "God wants you to be a winner, not a whiner"

Patty said...

Can we trust God's timing? We better b/c what other choice do we have. It will all work out in His good time. That's the topic in chapter 22. It's perfect timing. Today is St. Patty's Day and this is Easter week so it's a wonderful time of year. With the coming of spring, there is an almost tangible sense of hope in the air. Joel tells us that when we understand God's perfect timing, we won't be stressed out any more. Habakkuk 2:3 says, "The vision is for an appointed time. Though it tarry, wait earnestly for it, for it will come to pass." Here is a beautiful prayer and meditation to view this Holy week. God bless! http://www.beliefnet.com/morningprayer/morningprayer.html